PoliticalActivist

It’s a bustling High St in SnoozeCity and JadedSnapper has been sent on one of his favourite assignments, a demonstration. A supermarket is opening today.

PoliticalActivist: [with megaphone] Down with corporate greed! Give people what they need! No BigSupermarket! No BigSupermarket! No BigSupermarket!…Down with corporate greed! … – You there! What are you doing! Are you the filth?!

JadedSnapper: Well I didn’t have a bath today if that’s what you mean?

PoliticalActivist: No! You’re from the pigs, the rozzers, the peelers, the polis, the bloody filth, the faaacking fuzz! That’s why you’re takin’ pictures!

JS: Erm, I’m just from the Evening Snooze…

PoliticalActivist: [with megaphone at JS] Down with corporate greed!

JS: So, if I could just, you know, snap away at this news event…

PoliticalActivist: Corporate Media whore! [putting down megaphone] Why are you wasting your life selling your soul to the corporate media? You are controlled by capitalism…

JS: Erm…okay. So I take you don’t want any coverage?

PoliticalActivist: Oh no, I didn’t mean it like that. I mean we all have to get our message out…

JS: Of course. So why are you protesting against BigSupermarket?

PoliticalActivist: BigSupermarket are destroying the community

JS: Oh, well it’s opening today, isn’t it a bit late?

PoliticalActivist: It’s vital we make a stand against corporate greed!

JS: So how are you doing that?

PoliticalActivist: Well first I’ve chalked ‘Down with Corporate Greed’..

JS: Oh yes, lovely, where’s –

PoliticalActivist: ‘Give people what they need’? Well I ran out of space, it’s only a small store see..

JS: Is that it?

PoliticalActivist: Hell no! Our nonhierarchicaldecisionmakingcollective have agreed upon a new tactic!

JS: Why was there no capital letters in that nonhierarchical thingy?

PoliticalActivist: All letters are equal.

JS: Oh…so what’s the new tactic?

PoliticalActivist: Active Resistance!

JS: Is that where you lie on the floor an’ that

PoliticalActivist: No, that’s passive resistance

JS: So are you going to glue the locks?

PoliticalActivist: No that’s direct action, the nonhierarchicaldecisionmakingcollective voted that down

JS: Why?

PoliticalActivist: It’s naughty

JS: Well, it would stop people getting in

PoliticalActivist: That’s where active resistance comes in

JS: So what are you going to do?

PoliticalActivist: We’re going to lie down on the floor… and then roll towards ’em

JS: That’ll stop them

PoliticalActivist: Anyway you’re paper will side with the corporate interests so you can do what you like

JS: Why’s that?

PoliticalActivist: Well the corporate media’s merely an expression of the capitalist system. You are blinded by corporate conditioning. Open your eyes! You are controlled by advertising!

JS: Slight problem with that though…

PoliticalActivist: What’s that

JS: No bugger will advertise with us anymore

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About jadedsnapper

Reinforcing the stereotype that local press photographers are more miserable than the people they photograph
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One Response to PoliticalActivist

  1. terakopian says:

    “All letters are equal” – genius!! LOL!!

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