It’s a bustling High St in SnoozeCity and JadedSnapper has been sent on one of his favourite assignments, a demonstration. A supermarket is opening today.

PoliticalActivist: [with megaphone] Down with corporate greed! Give people what they need! No BigSupermarket! No BigSupermarket! No BigSupermarket!…Down with corporate greed! … – You there! What are you doing! Are you the filth?!

JadedSnapper: Well I didn’t have a bath today if that’s what you mean?

PoliticalActivist: No! You’re from the pigs, the rozzers, the peelers, the polis, the bloody filth, the faaacking fuzz! That’s why you’re takin’ pictures!

JS: Erm, I’m just from the Evening Snooze…

PoliticalActivist: [with megaphone at JS] Down with corporate greed!

JS: So, if I could just, you know, snap away at this news event…

PoliticalActivist: Corporate Media whore! [putting down megaphone] Why are you wasting your life selling your soul to the corporate media? You are controlled by capitalism…

JS: Erm…okay. So I take you don’t want any coverage?

PoliticalActivist: Oh no, I didn’t mean it like that. I mean we all have to get our message out…

JS: Of course. So why are you protesting against BigSupermarket?

PoliticalActivist: BigSupermarket are destroying the community

JS: Oh, well it’s opening today, isn’t it a bit late?

PoliticalActivist: It’s vital we make a stand against corporate greed!

JS: So how are you doing that?

PoliticalActivist: Well first I’ve chalked ‘Down with Corporate Greed’..

JS: Oh yes, lovely, where’s –

PoliticalActivist: ‘Give people what they need’? Well I ran out of space, it’s only a small store see..

JS: Is that it?

PoliticalActivist: Hell no! Our nonhierarchicaldecisionmakingcollective have agreed upon a new tactic!

JS: Why was there no capital letters in that nonhierarchical thingy?

PoliticalActivist: All letters are equal.

JS: Oh…so what’s the new tactic?

PoliticalActivist: Active Resistance!

JS: Is that where you lie on the floor an’ that

PoliticalActivist: No, that’s passive resistance

JS: So are you going to glue the locks?

PoliticalActivist: No that’s direct action, the nonhierarchicaldecisionmakingcollective voted that down

JS: Why?

PoliticalActivist: It’s naughty

JS: Well, it would stop people getting in

PoliticalActivist: That’s where active resistance comes in

JS: So what are you going to do?

PoliticalActivist: We’re going to lie down on the floor… and then roll towards ’em

JS: That’ll stop them

PoliticalActivist: Anyway you’re paper will side with the corporate interests so you can do what you like

JS: Why’s that?

PoliticalActivist: Well the corporate media’s merely an expression of the capitalist system. You are blinded by corporate conditioning. Open your eyes! You are controlled by advertising!

JS: Slight problem with that though…

PoliticalActivist: What’s that

JS: No bugger will advertise with us anymore

About jadedsnapper

Reinforcing the stereotype that local press photographers are more miserable than the people they photograph
This entry was posted in PoliticalActivist, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

1 Response to PoliticalActivist

  1. terakopian says:

    “All letters are equal” – genius!! LOL!!

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