PhotoUnquote #2

Ladies and Gentlemen, a quick post to ressurect the blog, and one you can join in on. My best, genuine, snapper excuses, along with their translations. Comment or tweet @jadedsnapper!


“The camera’s battery went flat in the last minute of the game -that’s why I didn’t get the killer goal”

I nicked off just before the end to beat the traffic

“During that dawn police raid both my flashguns broke.”

Didn’t charge ’em, again

Sorry I’m late – I was double booked”

And the last job had a buffet on

“He was looking the other way”

I was looking the other way

“I made an aesthetic choice to take a picture with the other snappers in’

I got pushed out the scrum. No one likes me.

“This lens is shit. It wouldn’t focus”

This lens is in manual

“The camera’s broken. Every time I fired the trigger, the camera’s viewfinder went black!!”

I’ve never seen the Mirror-Up setting before.

“Sorry you didn’t like the last picture I took of you, the PictureBoss put the wrong one through”

I hate you

“Did I crop out your logo? I do apologise”

I hate you

“What do you mean you looked like a pervert in that picture?”

You are a pervert. And I hate you.

About jadedsnapper

Reinforcing the stereotype that local press photographers are more miserable than the people they photograph
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5 Responses to PhotoUnquote #2

  1. G I Jones says:

    I failed to get a snatch shot of Mr X leaving his house because he cleverly evaded my detection by using the back entrance to his property

    I failed to get a snatch shot of Mr X leaving his house because he cleveryly evaded my detection by driving straight past the coffee shop I was in leaving me no opportunity to get a frame of him.

  2. Neil Holmes says:

    I now know the difference between M, F, FP, and X sync, it won’t happen again, can we crop the bottom of the frame, or perhaps get them to dodge it in the darkroom, I’m sure the details there!

  3. “Flash didn’t fire on this shot. It would be perfect otherwise”

    Flash didn’t fire because it was recycling after I pressed the shutter prematurely.

  4. jadedsnapper says:

    The best to date comes from twitter user @crphoto:

    “Sorry, had no wifi or 3G”

    Left card reader on my desk

    True genius!

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